Getting the Chancla: Love Taps?
The other day my Mami and I were watching “las ‘tal’noticias esas,” as she calls them, her jab at the fact that she feels news is no longer news. And just as my mom was about to nod off for her afternoon siesta, the anchorman introduced a video of a judge hitting his daughter, and posed the question: “Has he gone to far?”
All of a sudden my Mami perked up and said “Aver sube el volumen y shhhh” and she acted as if the Pope was about to give a speech.
The following is a glimpse into the conversation that ensued. Some the original content has been withheld in order to protect the identity of the author…meaning me, because Mami didn’t raise no fool:
Mami: “Mira esa *expletive,* she’s lucky she’s not my daughter, making her Papi work hard to teach her lessons…y bien merecida por seguro…with all that moving around, what does she think this is a joke o Mira Quien Baila?”
Daughter, who is having childhood flashbacks: “Maybe she doesn’t get hit often and hasn’t realized she has to play dead to get him to stop.”
Mami: “No seas berrinchuda …acting as if you played dead, since when did you play dead? I swear you where the only child I ever met that liked to get hit so much you would do backflips asking for one more chancletada. Besides, a good parent knows when their child is really dead, and playing with your parents emotions will only get you more chanclazos.”
Daughter who has learned her lessons and knows better than to point out the backflips where to get away from la chancla: “Look Mami, she keeps dancing around!”
Mami: “Que..que? Y todavia she puso that on video. Madre Santisma… where does she live? No eso es invasion of privacy? A la carcel con ella! Has he gone too far? Pfft…not far enough, te digo. Te recuerdas when you thought you were going to call La Policia on me? Her beating would have been worse than that. That mocosa would have been buried with the camera she thought was so cute to tape me with. Where is your sister? I want her to see this… I want to show her what she has coming the next time she tells me she won’t sign me into El Face Book…aver pressale rewind a esa *expletive.*”
(That expletive was in referece to my Mami’s new friend the DVR, it currently has about six novelas saved, from start to finish.)
As I ran to get my sister, fearing she would take out her rage at seeing that “malcriada” be victimized out on me, Mami got on the phone to alert las Tias that there was a kid on the loose who was threatening the sanctity of a good nalgazo. That conversation went a little like this:
“Oye, te recuerdas that time (the Anonymous author) broke the phone on her head trying to call the police? Bueno, ay una *expletive* que filmo a su papa pegandole, tu crees?…hmm mmmm mm… De acuerdo, we have to make un ejemplo de esa *expletive* so these mensos of ours don’t get any ideas. Yo no se que pasa con esta gente de este pais, por todo lo bueno que tiene, los parents are estupid… he should have checked the room first.”
So if you like me watched in horror as this young girl got beat and your mom acted as if it was a boxing match yelling at the TV “Y Uno mas para que se aplaque ” and her motto is “ Mejor that I show you love with my taps, than you get tapped in jail”….you know you are Latina.
At least the old-style, chancla-throwing, correa-hitting kind.
If you’ve seen, or heard about, the video of the Texas judge beating his then-16-year-old daughter, has it brought up questions for you about the corporal punishment of children? Were you spanked? Do you spank your children?
How do you feel about corporal punishment in familias?